Well, wouldn’t you know it? Just when I thought my spiritual journey had hit its final, zen-like plateau, Master G, our spiritual guru at Daily Prana, decided I was due for a spiritual “upgrade”. So, after an almost celestial Saturday spent in meditation review and full moon meditation, she convinced me to embark on a fresh 40-day Mala and meditation routine. I thought, why not? It’s not like my schedule is packed or anything ;-).

So, here I am, post-‘enlightenment’, diligently checking off my daily spiritual chores like some overachiever. Can I feel a change? Honestly, the jury’s still out on that one. I mean, I can’t tell if my chakras are more aligned or my aura has a new shimmer. But, hey, we’ll see how it pans out. You never know with these spiritual practices.

As for my niece Adrielle, it’s another episode in the ongoing medical drama. The poor girl is still confined at the Teresita Jalandoni hospital with her baby Xavi under strict watch. If doctors were scriptwriters, their plot would have more twists than a telenovela! Depending on the day, Xavi is either okay, or not. Yes, the inconsistency is mind-boggling.

Adrielle’s frustration is through the roof, especially since two doctors have given her a green light, while a third one waved a caution sign. But, if they’re already there, why not hang around until baby Xavi gets a unanimous all-clear, right? I mean, imagine the inconvenience if they got discharged, only to discover something was STILL amiss with Xavi! Here’s hoping that the drama ends soon and that my brother Rey can handle the financial pressures piling up.

Now, speaking of stress, let me tell you about our yoga session yesterday. I swear, Master G must’ve been in a foul mood because that routine was brutal! Even our seasoned yogis were dropping like flies, opting to watch the madness unfold from the sidelines. Somehow, we survived, taking a group photo to commemorate the experience or maybe as proof of life for our future selves.

Post the yoga trauma, I visited my gynecologist, and guess what she had to say? Your girl is hitting menopause! Full-blown menopause, at the ripe old age of 44. Isn’t that just peachy? Hot flushes, memory issues, uncontrolled rage; the whole shebang! She suggested I switch to an estrogen patch, but thanks to the unending stock issues, I’m on a gel instead.

A quick pitstop at Starbucks saw Ralph lose his cool over their incessant price hikes. The poor man couldn’t believe his eyes when his usual P500 bill didn’t get him any change. I mean, really Starbucks? Are price hikes every two months the new norm?

Now let me tell you about the real mystery: the case of the oily windshield wiper. It all began after our Full Moon meditation last June 3rd when we dropped off our dear friend, manang Goyie Estiller, at Camella South. Our previously clear view turned into a murky haze, each swipe of the wiper smearing black oil across the windshield. What followed was a nerve-wracking journey, with multiple pit stops at gas stations to manually clean the windshield. So we got the car checked at Smart Lube Car Care Center yesterday, where they found the wiper fluid reservoir contaminated with oil. As for how that happened? No one has a clue. But in Ralph’s detective mind, all clues lead back to the last service center, CML.

So, from spiritual growth to medical dramas, surprise menopause, and oily wiper mysteries, life’s never a dull moment. Tune in for the next chapter of my absurdly entertaining journey. Until then, keep breathing and remember to check your windshield wipers!