I’m at my biggest and I don’t like it!


I don’t have a weighing scale at home so I didn’t get a chance to take my actual weight, but the last time we went to the doctor and the receptionist weighed me for my record, if memory serves, I think I was 190 plus pounds which is horrible! And that was months ago! I’m pretty sure I’m way past 200 lbs. now. I’ve never been this heavy in the past and besides taking a toll on my health, this weight issues have also affected me psychologically.

I no longer want to go out because going out simply means putting something on that looks somehow pleasant and when I’m home, I wear nothing but super huge baggy clothes where I don’t feel any constriction in any part of my body. Naturally, I can’t use that outside! It’s just making me miserable seriously! Ralph thinks I have now become a fallen Catholic because I hardly go to Sunday mass anymore. I kept making excuses not to go but I never actually told him that it’s got something to do with my appearance. It may seem shallow to other people but wait till they’re on my shoe and then they’ll understand.

Anyway, I have decided to actually do something about it. Eating vegetables is what Ralph wanted me to do. The problem there is, I don’t eat vegetables!!!!!! So that means eating NOTHING is what it comes down to! I actually resent him for giving me a hard time before when I was really so enthusiastic about getting back in shape. I had started doing Tae Bo exercises. But Ralph was makingĀ  a big deal about it and just so we don’t end up bickering each time he sees me going along Billy Blank’s 50-minute advance workout, I decided to put an end to it. And look where it got me!

The picture that you see above is my meal yesterday. But that took a lot of effort. Thinking about it now makes me wanna puke. I can’t believe I actually ate that! Ewww! Anyway, because I can’t really eat that, I think I’m just going to settle to eating LESS. Still eat what I normally eat but on a very small serving. No snacks in between and maybe more water? I was seriously fit before and I never even had to eat these veggies that Ralph always tries to get me into.

Ok, we’ll see from here. Wish me luck!


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